Tag Archives: fantasy

Swallow You Whole

Book Review of Swallow You Whole, by Jasper Black

Swallow You Whole

I won a signed copy of Swallow You Whole, by Jasper Black, from Goodreads.

Description:
For two villainous nobles, it is a desperate means to an end. For two clever demons…it is one hell of a tax break. 

Henry and James have accidentally staked claim on the same soul. Elliot Dosett, the bitter and sickly son of a successful steel magnate, summoned a demon in hopes of solving his trouble with his father and inheriting the estate. Violet Clifton, his aunt, also summoned a demon in order to rid herself of a useless husband and take over the business he leaves behind. In order to delay her own death, she also signs away Elliot’s soul. And so the paperwork begins to fly.

Lady is a fallen angel. He is also one of Hell’s top auditors. He is sent to monitor the activity of Henry and James. Once he finds out which demon is trying to cheat Hell, his job is to send them back in chains.

Henry will do anything to avoid being reported, dragging James and Lady down the path of a capricious scheme. Yet Satan is hot on their heels and will stop at nothing to hunt them all down; even if that means interrupting God’s latest round of golf.

Review:
A point of clarification on the front end, I would not consider this a romance. Maybe I’m the only one who mistakenly thought it would be, but I don’t think it is. Whatever it is, horror-slash-humor maybe, I quite enjoyed.

I liked both James and Henry. I thought God, Satan and the other angels/sins that show up were well characterized. Violet and Elliot, the peevish, evil humans, were suitably evil. There were a few unexpected turns. The author stuck with the inevitable ending, which pleased me and there were quite a few ironic, funny moments.

I did find the fact that the celestial realms seemed to run on a different time than earth jarring and anachronistic. I understand it was purposeful, but it still pulled me out of the story. Lastly, I think it could have done with another editing pass. But the truth is I’d almost forgive it this for the awesome cover.


What I’m drinking: What the English might call Builder’s tea. One inexpensive bag of black tea, quite strong and a dash of milk. This is one of my comfort drinks. These days, I’m often off dairy. So, I don’t drink it as often. But for pure, melt into the couch relaxation, it’s my go-to drink.

A Promise of Fire

Book Review of A Promise of Fire (Kingmaker Chronicles #1), by Amanda Bouchet

A Promise of FIre

I won a copy of Amanda Bouchet‘s A Promise of Fire from Night Owl Reviews.

Description from Goodreads:
Catalia “Cat” Fisa is a powerful clairvoyant known as the Kingmaker. This smart-mouthed soothsayer has no interest in her powers and would much rather fly under the radar, far from the clutches of her homicidal mother. But when an ambitious warlord captures her, she may not have a choice…

Griffin is intent on bringing peace to his newly conquered realm in the magic-deprived south. When he discovers Cat is the Kingmaker, he abducts her. But Cat will do everything in her power to avoid her dangerous destiny and battle her captor at every turn. Although up for the battle, Griffin would prefer for Cat to help his people willingly, and he’s ready to do whatever it takes to coax her…even if that means falling in love with her.

Review:
Oh man, I have SUCH disappointment about this book. Authors, could you explain to me why you would set up a whole world around a female character, give her god-like powers, training, skill and intelligence, then infantilize her and allow her to be overpowered by a man for an ENTIRE book? Why? WHY?!

Cat seemed to have boundless powers that develop as needed—very deus ex machina of the moment sort of thing. She defeated dragons, killed thirty soldiers with a single breath, had prophetic dreams, was a soothsayer, was protected by gods (plural). Yet, in the face of one man she’s helpless. What’s more, she’s also presented as unreasonable and needlessly angry that he kidnapped her. Literally, she asked why he expected her to accept him and her situation and he said, “I expected you to be reasonable” and she internally agreed. Excuse me? He abducted her, unknowingly exposed her, threatened her friends and adoptive family. I’m pretty sure surliness and trying to escape IS the reasonable response. And she is kidnapped in the very beginning, so she’s basically a helpless captive for the whole book.

So, I’m angry that the supposedly strong female was basically, ‘strong, but not as strong as the men’ but I died a little with each cliché that was thrown in. The scene where she got accidentally high as a result of her own actions and lets all her guards down, acting inviting and sexy, but being “happy like a child” and needing protection. The one where the scorned woman went homicidal. The one where ‘her body betrayed her’ by being attracted to the man who kidnapped her. The ones where she had to be a virgin because good heroines never have sex with anyone but their hero. My god, this book was practically a cobbled together series of romantic fantasy clichés. It was also repetitive as hell.

The writing, it was fine and I appreciated that when Cat’s curvy body was compared to her thin counterpart she was the one found most appealing, on more than one occasion. Those who don’t mind seeing their women dominated by their romantic lead will probably enjoy it. I personally want to burn the darned thing, but instead I’ll put it in my Little Free Library and hopefully someone in the neighborhood will enjoy it more than me.

Taming Heather

Book Review of Taming Heather (Cariboo Lunewulf #1), by Lorie O’Clare

I’m trying to read some of the physical book from my shelves, to make room for new ones and to replenish the restock stash for my Little Free Library. Wanna see a picture? I’m awful proud of it.

Sadie's Little Free Library

Anyhow, I’m trying to clear out the physical book, so this was my morning.

Taming Heather

I picked up this used copy of Taming Heather, by Lorie O’Clare, from Goodwill for $0.70.

Description from Goodwill:
Heather Graham had one thing in mind—furthering her career. And an exposé on the werewolves in her community would do just that. All she needed was to get up close and personal with one of them, and she could write an article that would give her front-page coverage across the nation. Her career would skyrocket! And Marc McAllister was just the man—and werewolf—to help her do it.But when Marc realizes Heather’s flirty behavior exists solely so she can exploit werewolves in her newspaper, he decides it’s time to show little Miss Graham exactly how a werewolf behaves. And Marc McAllister isn’t just any werewolf, but purebred Cariboo Lunewulf—wild, strong, aggressive and the quintessential alpha male.In a clash of wills, bodies and souls, Marc and Heather set off enough sparks to start a raging fire. Drawing the wild side out of Marc hits Heather with a bolt of lust that won’t go away. Unexpectedly for Marc, he may just have met his match in the little spitfire.But their biggest hurdle may not be with each other, but from another direction entirely.

Review:
Oh man, this was bad. If I used stars here, I’d say it’s only avoiding a one star because I laughed a lot. (There was very little deliberate humor in it.) It was basically just a thin veneer of plot to allow for lots and lots of sex that essentially started the moment the man characters met. But hey, it’s Ellora’s Cave and that’s practically their business model. So, I can’t say I went in unaware. I happen to occasionally like that sort of book in a “I’m laughing with you, not at you sort of way.”

Unfortunately, the sex wasn’t that great. The writing was extremely repetitive, with the same stock words/phrases being used again and again and again and again, sometimes more than once within the same paragraph, and the same information being provided over and over. The characters never really lived up to their description; the book depending on that description to give them life, instead of providing proof. Plus, I thought Marc was a jerk. Lastly, the copyediting needed a bit more work and it contradicted itself.


What I’m drinking: Milky chai. My stepfather gave me some loose chai from The Natural Way, but I failed utterly in making it correctly. It hardly had any flavor at all. I think I didn’t boil it long enough, so it’s basically just warm, brown milk. *shrug* live and learn