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Book Review: Merry Elf-ing Christmas, by Beth Bolden

I won an ARC copy of Merry Elf-ing Christmas from the author (Beth Bolden) on Facebook, which was just in time to include it in my Christmas Reading Challenge.
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Aidan might be a bad elf, but he’s never been naughty.

Aidan has always landed on Santa’s nice list, thank you very much. But that doesn’t mean he’s cut out to be a North Pole elf; instead of worrying about the dwindling magic of Christmas, he’d much rather be back in Tir na Nog, calculating where the next end of the rainbow is going to land.

Instead he’s freezing his butt off in Santa’s sleigh.

His situation seems grim despite all the decking the halls, until on Christmas Eve, during a milk and cookies run, he meets Dexter, an engineering student.

They couldn’t be more different, and Dexter couldn’t be more forbidden, but Aidan is drawn to the handsome human anyway. Over the next year, their emails start out as a entertaining way to pass the time in all his interminable elf meetings, but soon, hearing from Dex becomes the very best part of his day.

And when they meet up on the next Christmas Eve? Aidan and Dex discover that their infatuation is so much more than just attraction. If they believe in each other and in the love they share, together their magic might be powerful enough to save Christmas.

my review

Often times reading and what someone likes is 100% subjective. That was very apparent to me while reading this book. I’ll say up front that it’s not a bad book. It’s cute and sweet, Christmas focused, and full of likeable characters. But it wasn’t a  good book FOR ME for one pretty solid reason.

I am not someone who shies away from cursing or sex. But Christmas books that use Santa and his elves as fodder walk a very fine border with childish. Look at that cute cover. Imagine that elf up and walking around, talking and laughing and eating milk and cookies. Now imagine him cursing, giving head, and getting f*cked. For me those disparate images never fully merged and I felt like F-bombs and sexual tension (and eventual sex) got dropped in a children’s book and it didn’t work FOR ME. But I know it will 100% work for others.

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Other Reviews:

Review: Merry Elf-ing Christmas by Beth Bolden


Come back this evening. I’ll be reviewing The Plight Before Christmas, by Kate Stewart and tomorrow, when I’ll be reviewing A Hopeful Christmas, by Walker, Bessey, Kelly, and Jensen.

eternal micah's mate

Book Review – Eternal: Micah’s Mate, by Tianna Xander

You guys, I promised myself that this year I wouldn’t find myself in mid-December scrambling to find the last few books for my yearly Author Alphabet Challenge. I was gonna have read a book by an author for every letter of the alphabet early this year. And I was on target to do it too. I had read everything except X and maybe U by about August. But man that X-author just kept right out of reach and here it is December 16th and I’ve just now made a desperate grab for an X-authored book, just like every year. Thus I read Eternal: Micah’s Mate, by Tianna Xander. I’m happy to be able to say it completes my challenge, but disappointed that I let it get this far into the year again. Maybe next year will be the year I get it complete early.
eternal micah's mate
It feels like the whole world is against her – but that doesn’t mean there’s no time for love.

I was sure I’d end up alone forever. But as soon as I bumped into six-foot-six of tall, dark, and handsome male vampire perfection, my plans were thrown on their head. Being wanted for murder sucks – but after meeting Micah, things suddenly don’t seem so bad after all…

Micah swore to protect my father’s interests… even if that means babysitting his sassy and snarky daughter. He knows I have an attitude – but he’s still drawn to me. And between his skills and my interdimensional magic, we might just be able to make it out of this in one piece…

my review

This simply isn’t very good. The mechanical writing and editing seems fine, but the plotting and story are a mess. In fact, I’d go so far as to say that this isn’t a story. It’s a series of random events connected only in that the main character is there for all of them. There is no story to become invested in because there is no story to follow. It’s just what random thing will happen next with no foreshadowing, buildup, or explanation before falling instantly into irrelevance. New characters are being introduced all the way until the end, which means the reader has no connection of care for them. Nothing has any emotional impact, because nothing is given any time to develop. There is very little world-building and a ton of inconsistencies even in what there is. Honestly, if I hadn’t needed an X-author for my yearly Author Alphabet Challenge I’d have DNFed this pretty early on.

eternal micah's mate

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Book Review: Christmas Lites II, edited by Amy Eye

I won a Smashwords copy of Christmas Lites II, several years ago. I kept meaning to read it and then it would get re-burried in my TBR. But this year, I made sure it was part of my Christmas Reading Challenge.

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Join us this Christmas season as authors from across the globe unite to spread holiday cheer and raise money for a very important cause. You will delight in the various stories these authors have created in order to take you on a journey from inside their heads and into your heart. Fairy tales, mysteries, journeys with zombies and monsters, vampires, angels, trips to the North Pole and much more await inside the covers of this book. All proceeds from the book are being donated to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence. Not only will you get a taste of the spirit of the season, but you will do so knowing you did your part in helping a very worthy cause. Merry Christmas!


These are all really short. There are 20 stories here, in a 197 page book (including front and end-matter). That’s, an average of less than 10 pages apiece. So, I’ll just give each a couple sentences as review—basically just my general thoughts—and then finish with my overall thoughts on the collection.

Santa’s Ninja Elf: Hunter’s Revenge, by Lizzy Ford

This was super cute in a silly, don’t think too deeply about it sort of way. I liked it.

A (Not) Very Neighborly Christwitchas, by Patti Larsen

Cute, with a conversational tone. But I’m not sure I got the point. I expected it to culminate into something and it never did. Still cute though.

A mermaid for Christmas, Nichole Chase

Cute, but maybe a little too cutesy for my. Though I liked getting to see the perspective of Christmas in the islands.

Ugly and the Prince, by Monica La Porta

This one I didn’t like at all—problematic in too many ways. The implication that women can be beautiful or intelligent, but not both (or that learning and/or intelligence is something you receive in exchange for beauty). The implication that a woman (or person) can’t be loved it they’re not physically attractive. The ending that makes her lack of physical attraction acceptable only because it can’t be seen. The suggestion that the love of a man is enough to ease her into society, while nothing she did on her own was. Most old fairy-tales are problematic, if you really think about them, but new ones don’t have to be.

The Light of Truth, by Lynn Rush

Meh, I wasn’t thrilled to find such a blatantly religious story included. And it tried to cram too much into too few pages.

A Fading House, by EC Stilson

Meh, not enough to it to really accomplish what it set out to and the God bit felt unneeded.

The Hunt: Vol II, by Amy Eye

Meh. Fine, but prosaic.

Wishmaster 2000, by JG Faherty

This reminded me of a Christmas Goosebumps story. I imagine my kids might like it, but it was a little juvenile for me.

The Christmas Parrot, by Vered Ehsani

Not so much a story as a small vignette that happened to have Christmas tacked on to fit the anthology. It did remind me to go check if my daughter’s chameleon had water though.

Rent-A-Christmas, by Kimberly Kinrade

This is a short in The Forbidden Trilogy world, and while it was follow-able I didn’t appreciate not knowing the rest of the series. Beyond that, I thought it super sappy (too sappy for me), but not bad.

The Locket, by JA Clement

This one packs quite a lot of worldbuilding into a short story (enough that I have to wonder if there isn’t a longer work somewhere that it ties into). It was pleasant, but more a vignette than a story.

Joseph, by Melynda Fleury

Literally just the birth of Jesus from Joseph’s perspective. Far too religious for me.

Table Five, by Misty Baker

A sweet little reminder to do nice things.

Momma’s Last Christmas, by Cassie McCown

Sad, but one of the best stories in the collection. It creates such a sense of place without ever telling where it is.

A Monstrous Christmas, by Frank W. Smith

I didn’t particularly care for this one and if “frank W. Smith” is male as the name infers, I wouldn’t be at all surprised. The idea that deep-level contempt can be erased by a single kindness is farcical and the characters little bit of later self-awareness did nothing to overcome my dislike for them formed in the beginning of the story.

The Loving Dead, by Angela Yuriko Smith

I really liked the beginning of this and was kind of ‘meh’ on the second half. But, overall, it was pretty good.

Merry Christmas, You Guys, by S. Patrick Pothier

This felt like a Halloween Horror – Christmas mash-up. But I found it amusing all the same.

Accidentally Smitten, by Tricia Kristufek

I was pretty ‘meh’ on this one. I thought the guy felt a little skeevy, so I didn’t really feel the spark. But I understand what the author was going for.

The Rise of Rae, by Trish Thawer

This story was a fail for me. I didn’t understand what giving her the ostracizing name had to do with her eventual destiny. And the whole thing just felt a little too generic-fairy tale to me. Plus, the fairy grips an iron door handle, which threw me for a loop since fae are traditionally thought to be allergic to iron.

Someone to Love, by Addison Moore

Weird. The writing was pretty but the story was weird.

The Unicorn Who Saved Christmas, by Elizabeth Evans

Very childish…as in it is a children’s story, not as a criticism.

***

All in all, none of these blew me away but none seemed too horrible either. I do wish, at the collection level, the editors had decided to make it a religious anthology or avoided including explicitly religious stories. Yes, I know Christmas = birth of Christ, etc. But most of these stories are fairly agnostic, such that those that were explicitly about God or Jesus stood out and felt out of place to me. On the whole, it’s a fine collection of short stories.

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Come back tomorrow. I’ll be reviewing Merry Elf-ing Christmas, by Beth Bolden.