Book Review of Jeaniene Frost’s Halfway to the Grave

Halfway to the GraveAfter dozens of recommendations I finally broke down and bought Jeaniene Frost‘s PNR Halfway to the Grave when I saw it discounted the other day.

Description from Goodreads:
Half-vampire Catherine Crawfield is going after the undead with a vengeance, hoping that one of these deadbeats is her father–the one responsible for ruining her mother’s life. Then she’s captured by Bones, a vampire bounty hunter, and is forced into an unholy partnership.

In exchange for finding her father, Cat agrees to train with the sexy night stalker until her battle reflexes are as sharp as his fangs. She’s amazed she doesn’t end up as his dinner–are there actually good vampires? Pretty soon Bones will have her convinced that being half-dead doesn’t have to be all bad. But before she can enjoy her newfound status as kick-ass demon hunter, Cat and Bones are pursued by a group of killers. Now Cat will have to choose a side . . . and Bones is turning out to be as tempting as any man with a heartbeat.

Review:
Saying I’m disappointed in this book would be an understatement. I have close to two thousand books on my Kindle, many of them free, but I shelled money out for this one because so many people rave about it. I’m totally boggled. Why?

I love vampire based PNR, but this book had so many of the genre’s tropes that I hate all in one place. The  emotionally unstable, angry heroine who is also painfully virginal and unaware of  her own sexuality. “I didn’t like it before. I think something is wrong with me.” Really? Despite how the whole thing worked out it never occurred to you that is was just bad sex? Her insistence on holding onto old slights so long that they become character traits. The way she went all embarrassingly cave-man possessive whenever a attractive female came around. Pet names, god the patronising pet names! The way Bones knew more about her abilities than she did. 22 years and she never noticed that she could see ghosts, for example, but he knew somehow. The constant reminders of female victimhood. (I’ll be coming back to that one.) The characters complete unwillingness to communicate in any sort of civil manner, etc. 

If I had to name the theme of this story it wouldn’t be romance, erotica or even vampires. It would be women as sexual victims and the use of sex as a form of control and degradation. There are so many references to prostitution in this book I lost count. Cat’s mother is considered a whore because she had a child out of wedlock. Cat is seen similarly by extension and even called one by her mother at one point. Sergio calls Cat one before their final encounter. Bones admits to having been a gigolo when he was alive. The whole plot hinges on hunting down the head of a human trafficking prostitution ring. Though admittedly with a vampire & ghoul twist. Cat has to dress like a slut so that she can attract her marks, often posing as a working girl in the process. This despite the fact that she ostensibly has to sit through hours of dirty talk before hunting a man who has a penitent for underage girls. Really, what exactly does he appreciate about their underage status if not their innocence? Seems to me that’s the wrong front to be presenting.

And that’s just prostitution references. I could go on another whole rant about the rape victims and/or suggested victims. This book should make women fear being alone with ANY MAN. They all seem to be predators of some sort. It sapped the enjoyment right out of the book for me. There are so many sexual victims it blots out the story. I appreciate a little sexual tension here and there, but that isn’t what was sprinkled throughout this book. I felt male privilege leering at each and every female character in this book. It was disquieting. 

Then there were all of the subtle (and occasionally not so subtle) indictments of modern human behaviour that was often painfully oversimplified and arrogant almost beyond palatability. Sorry, having some slutty vampire bitch preach at me about the failure of the government to stamp out the modern slave trade in Brazil (or where ever) or ‘honour rapes’ in Pakistan didn’t fly too well with me. It certainly didn’t excuse her vampire boss. 

I’ve seen a number of previous reviewers compare Bones and Cat to Buffy and Spike. I can COMPLETELY see that. It’s there, not doubt about it (intentional or not). On a related side note, Bones’ English is rubbish. I lived in Northern England for a number of years and let me tell you it isn’t convincing. 

Possibly most annoying of all, however,  is that after spending 95% of the book wishing it would just end already Bradley Tate (and maybe Timmie) made me curious what what might happen next. I do not want to be tempted into any more of this drivel in the hopes that book two is better than this first one. When my two favourite people in the book are both MINOR side characters there is a problem. 

Book Review of C.S. Marks’ Elfhunter & The Fire King

ElfhunterA representative of C.S. Marks sent me a copy of Elfhunter (Tales of Alterra, The World That Is #1) for review.

Description from Goodreads:
This is the tale of Gorgon Elfhunter, a monstrous, mysterious creature who has sworn to destroy all the Elves of Alterra—until none remain. It is the story of Wood-elven heroine Gaelen Taldin, who has sworn to rid her world of the Elfhunter even as she is hunted by him. The conflict between them creates a tangled web that blurs the line between Light and Darkness, love and obsession, free will and fate. Filled with moments both tender and terrifying, thrilling yet thought-provoking, it is a timeless epic fantasy suitable for readers of all ages. Join the Company of Elves, dwarves, mortal men, and delightfully intelligent horses. Come to Alterra—the “World that Is”.

Review:
Elfhunter will likely appeal to most Tolkien fans. It would be almost impossible to miss the similarities between the two. I read Tolkien when I was younger and I loved his writing, his stories, and the way he could just reach in and snatch the breath from my chest with the seemingly simplest of prose. I enjoyed Marks’ writing, but it’s not Tolkien.

I have to be honest. There is a small part of me who whats to lay my head back, close my eyes, and just relish the fact that I finally finished this book. I would have gotten far more enjoyment out of it if it had ended 200 pages before it did. Now, that isn’t to say that I didn’t like the book. For the most part I did. There are some really fine characters here and a truly epic journey against a notable foe. I just thought that it was way too long. There are whole passages dedicated to what the horses are doing, for example. I’ll grant you that they are very charismatic and anthropomorphised horses, but I just don’t care what the horses are doing when their people/elves aren’t on them. I just don’t. Everything from clothing, to environs, to emotions is described in excruciating detail. The result is that the book moves at an agonisingly slow pace. Patience is a must for this one.

On the flip side of all of that detail is the fact that Marks in able to create a very detailed world. The elves, humans (who aren’t called humans BTW) and dwarfs all have fairly established societies. Granted, none of these venture far from the pre-established fantasy tropes. The elves are tall and graceful. They sing marvellously and live forever. The dwarfs are short and squat, grow beards, carry axes and tend toward mining and forging. The men are rough horsemen of noble heart. Nothing new in any of that. But Marks does a very good job of bring these societies to life.

I did struggle with the writing style a little bit. There isn’t anything ostensibly wrong with it, but I saw another reader refer to it as ‘uncomfortable.’ I know exactly what he meant. I wouldn’t have used that particular adjective, but the writing is stiff, almost formal. There are a lot of ‘he did this, for she had…” type of sentences. To a certain extent this fits the story. If focuses on elves,who are known to be aristocratic and, well, formal. But 500 pages later I really, really wanted to be able to relax with these characters and their language was prohibitive. Kind of like sitting down to tea with some prim English gentleman and then slurping the dregs of your soda through your straw–just not done. It grated on me eventually. I will concede that it was consistent and well edited though.

Most infuriating of all, however, is that after 500+ pages it ended with a ‘Meh.’ I needed a sweeping, grand finale to make it worth all the time invested. Instead there is the emotional equivalent of  ‘oh well, better luck next time.’ It is definitely not a satisfying ending. I realise, of course, that this is the first in a series, so in a way it isn’t the end. But still…

All in all I’m of two minds here. I did enjoy the story. I could pick it to death, sure. There are plenty of small things bothering me. Like the annoying way things kept creeping up from the elves long histories. Things like: ‘Oh yea, BTW she’s had her true love already. Didn’t you know?’ The youngest is over 1,000 years old so there is a lot of uncovered life that popped up from time to time. I never felt like I really knew them. But that’s a small matter. I can over look it and other small grievances enough to say with some certainty I enjoyed the story. On the other hand, I found finishing it a chore and it would be dishonest to say otherwise. I think this is a strong case of finding the right reader for the right book.

old elf hunterOn a side note, of no real importance to  anyone: I MUCH prefer the new cover (above) to the old one (right). In the new one she looks like a strong, aggressive 1,000 year old elf that no-one with half a mind would mess with. In this old one she looks like a frightened child. The two convey completely different messages and the new one is a vast improvement, as well as a more accurate portrayal of the character. I’m just sayin’.

The Fire KingAs I was reading Elfhunter I noticed The Fire King on the KDP list and grabbed it. It is a novella based in the same world as the novel.

Description from Goodreads:
From the creator of the beloved ELFHUNTER Series comes a tale of fate and faith, of the perils of pride, and of the power of love itself — as a King is forced to confront that which he has long denied–that which is in us all. The Shadow has come to Alterra: a force of such power and terror that none may stand against it. It has but one purpose: to lure Aincor to his doom.

Review:
The legend of Aincor was referenced more than once in Elfhunter and it was really interesting getting to read his story. I also really appreciated the little bit of history provided. I would almost suggest readers start here with The Fire King for just that reason.

I’m not a huge fan of novellas. They’re just glorified short stories as far as I’m concerned. I know that might be a little condescending considering I just complained about Elfhunter being too long, but there is just so little time for character development and I felt it here. The narration is almost entirely in the fashion of a storyteller. I.E. the reader is told what happens, what is felt, what is said and very little is experienced first hand.  This did enable Marks to relay a lot of information in a short word count, but there is a reason such narrative styles are largely reserved for spoken tales. I knew, because I had been informed, that the king was prideful, etc but I had no sense of him as a man. 

Be that as it may, it’s a fun little read and worth picking up. I enjoyed Aincor’s story. If you like the type of legends one might hear told around the campfire this is the book for you. It was really quite predictable. Between the tidbits given in the previous book and the basic set up of the plot it isn’t hard to figure out what will happen. But I’ve found that sometimes knowing where a story is going lets you feel a little closer to it. 

Review of Lani Diane Rich’s Time Off for Good Behavior

Time Off For Good BehaviorI grabbed Lani Diane Rich‘s novel Time Off for Good Behavior from the Amazon KDP list.

Description from Goodreads:
Expressing anger is healthy.

Wanda’s gonna live forever.

For Wanda Lane, life has been one long string of screw-ups. Her abusive ex-husband keeps threatening to kill her, she just lost her crappy job, and a head injury (sustained while diving off the witness stand to attack an obnoxious attorney) has left her hearing phantom music no one else can hear. It isn’t until she hits the rock bottom of her bottle of scotch that she begins to wonder if maybe — just maybe — the problem is her.

On her pothole-ridden path to becoming a decent human being, she makes friends with Elizabeth, a single mother looking for her own solid ground; Father Gregory, the patient priest who counsels Wanda, even though she’s not technically Catholic; and Walter, a Jimmy-Stewart-ish lawyer who is smart, sexy and single… and so far out of Wanda’s league that she thinks he must have been sent from God as one last punishment for her past transgressions. Can an angry, lost woman find her way back from failure, or are second chances the stuff of myth?

Wanda’s gonna find out.

You may want to move out of her way

Review:
I have to say I really enjoyed Wanda and all of her Idiosyncrasies. Honestly, the woman is just a little crazy for most of the book and the situations she finds herself in are patently absurd. So you do just kind of have to role with it to a certain extent. I think her terse relationship with Father Hard-Ass is my favourite. There is so much witty sarcasm, what someone else called snark, in this book that I couldn’t help but be constantly amused.

True conversation:
My husband sauntered into the living-room chuckling.
Me: “What?”
Him: “Nothing. I’m just laughing at you sitting there grinning to yourself.”
Me (waving my Kindle at him indignantly): “But it’s funny.”
Him (shaking his head knowingly): “I’m sure it is.”
Me (lovingly to his departing back): “Bastard”

Yep, that’s how it goes. Wanda’s journey of self-discovery is one I think a lot of women can relate to. If we’re all as lucky as her and can finally come to not only understand but accept ourselves life will surely improve. Of course, she is helped along by a whole cadre of new friends and one AMAZING new love interest. Yes, Walter (aka Jimmy Stewart) is just far too good to be true. So, of course, it’s impossible not to love him. It only took me an evening to read the book and I’m glad I gave it the time.