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Book Review of The “Wonderful” Wizard of Futhermucking Oz, by Matt Youngmark

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Through Goodreads, I won a copy of Matt Youngmark’s The “Wonderful” Wizard of Futhermucking Oz.

Description:
Arabella Grimsbro is a 15-year-old girl with a mouth like a dock worker and an attitude to match. When she walks into Voyages Through Literature—a cheesy mall store promising virtual reality tours of public domain classics—the last thing she expects is to be whisked away to an actual, magical world.

To make things worse, this Oz is very different from the one she saw in a movie when she was little. Ferocious beasts with grizzly bear bodies and tiger heads? A town of creepy, porcelain dolls? The Tin Woodsman lying broken and battered at the bottom of a ditch? Arabella will need more than surliness and silver slippers to find the answers at the end of this rainbow—or even just survive the trip.

A quick diversion:
Before I get to the review, can I just show you the Editor’s Note, which pretty much gives me life?

I laughed so hard at that and it perfectly establishes the tone of the book. Anyhow, moving on to an actual review, the actual review, as it were.

Review:
First off, that cover is just awesome pretty. Half Peruvian, angry ‘Dorothy’ is fearsome and I love her.

Secondly, I appreciate the diversity in the few non-Oz characters available to the author. (The Oz characters are, you know, a scarecrow, a tin man, a lion, a dog, some witches, flying monkeys, munchkins, etc. So, you know, Youngmark was maybe a little tied down with them.)

Thirdly, this book is funny. Utterly ridiculous, of course, but purposefully so. It’s completely hammed up. I had a ball with it.

Having said all that, I am glad it isn’t any longer than it is. Because for all its humor, it is still the story of Dorothy in Oz, a completely known and predictable plot. It is at the end of the day a one trick pony and if it had been much longer the schtick wouldn’t have been enough to carry it and I’d have lost interest. As it is, it ended in time and I enjoyed it quite a lot.

What I’m drinking: Look I figured this was the sort of book that would pair well with alcohol. So, I’m drinking Seagrum’s gin and orange-mango juice. Yes, I do realize that is an odd mix, but it came down to what was available in the house and it was gin and tropical juice or that stuff on the right. Since I did actually want to remember reading the book, the Chinese fire water wasn’t really an option. As it is, you might notice almost every picture is a little off kilter. Sorry ’bout that.

Coulrophobia and Fata Morgana

Review of Coulrophobia & Fata Morgana, by Jacob M. Appel

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I won a signed copy of Coulrophobia & Fata Morgana, by Jacob M. Appel, through LIbraryThing.

Description from Goodreads:
In his ninth book and fifth collection of stories, Jacob M. Appel introduces readers to a a diplomats wife who attempts to seduce her chimney sweep through Norwegian lessons, a minister whose dead wife is romantically involved with Greta Garbo and a landlord menaced by a rent-delinquent mime.

Review:
This is a collection of short stories and I’m on record several times as stating that I’m not a big fan of short stories, because I rarely find them satisfying. But if I’m going to read them I prefer to get my hands on a collection like this one. It gives me more of a feeling for the author than a mere 20 page snippet alone. And I liked Appel’s writing. I found the stories thoughtful and meaningful, which in a lot of circumstances is my biggest complaint about shorts. I don’t feel the accomplish anything by their end. Not here, I ended this book happy to have read it and each story in it.

A man recently told me I don’t review short stories properly, inferring that I’m reading them incorrectly. And I suppose if you expect me to be able and/or willing to go on at length about this being an example of the X type of story or the Y narrative format, I’d have to reluctantly swallow my allegation of mansplaining and concede the point. But I rather read and review shorts based on the simple maxim that I must enjoy them, regardless or how or why. I enjoyed Appel’s stories. It doesn’t matter to me why. That is enough. I easily recommend this book to those looking for a collection of easily digestible short stories.

Book Review of Blood Ice & Oak Moon: A Coon Hollow Coven Tale, by Marsha A. Moore

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I won an audible copy of Marsha A. Moore’s Blood Ice & Oak Moon.

Description from Goodreads:
Esme Underhill is about to discover a darkness hidden inside her that could destroy her chance for independence and possibly kill her.

Esme’s mother took her young daughter away from Southern Indiana’s Coon Hollow Coven to prevent her from learning about the unusual witchcraft she had inherited. When Esme is twenty-seven, her beloved Grammy Flora passes away and leaves her property in the Hollow to her granddaughter. With this opportunity to remake her life and gain independence, Esme attempts to emulate Grammy Flora as a wildwood mystic who relies on the hedge world of faeries to locate healing herbs. But fae are shrewd traders. When they open their world to her, she must meet the unknown malevolence of her birthright.

Thayne, the handsome king of the fae Winter Court, faces his own struggle to establish autonomy as a new regent. He is swept into the tempest of Esme’s unfolding powers, a dangerous threat to his court. His sworn duty is to protect his people, despite Esme’s beauty and allure, which tear at his resolve.

Both Esme’s and Thayne’s dreams of personal freedom are lost…unless they can trust each other and overcome surmounting dangers.

Review:
Sigh. This may just be a case of a book being poorly matched to a reader, but I didn’t much care for this. It wasn’t all out bad, but it wasn’t great either. If I had to break the review of my experience with this down to one statement, it would be both the book and the audio narration (by Jean Lowe Carlson) were only ok. Neither very good, but not all out bad either, or at least not to my liking.

I found the writing, especially the dialogue really stilted and stiff. This was apparent in the actual writing, but I think it was exacerbated by the way it was read by Carison.

Some people will probably like this kind of Mary Sue heroine, but I don’t see the appeal. She was 27, but the book reads like it is YA. Esmerelda was constantly on about becoming (not being, but becoming) and independent woman. Despite this, she was also always moaning about her mom, or daddy or grammy. And in the end, wanna know what she felt made her feel more independent than anything ever did before? Getting married. Arg, someone get me a drink STAT! And this after spending most of the book all cut up because of one bad past relationship. It was cliched.

She also defeated an all-powerful enemy with presumably hundreds of years of training and experience in less than a page with no training or experience of her own. I won’t quite call it deus ex mechana, because she had the power already. But I also couldn’t believe it.

I felt no chemistry between Esmeralda and Thayne and at no point did I see their relationship develop. They were just in love all of a sudden and she was being handed a princess’ happily ever after for no apparent reason.

I didn’t truly understand why her and her black amber were so sought after. I have no idea what the underlying motivation of at least one of the villains was, and only a vague idea about the others. (And why have so many independent enemies?) And at one point an established dictum of the universe, that fae can’t lie, is broken.

All in all, this is a strong case of ‘special snowflake’ heroine and I didn’t care for it. But I bet others really will.