Category Archives: book review

Review of Jolene Stockman’s Total Blueprint for World Domination

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Total BlueprintSo, this morning I asked my husband to choose a number, any number between 1-43. He looked at me a little funny, but humoured me and eventually chose 37. Now, he may not have realised it, but he had just decided my next read. I honestly couldn’t be arse to choose anything myself. It’s one of those days.  Book number 37 happened to be Total Blueprint for World Domination, by Jolene Stockman. I was sent this book by the author for the purpose of an honest review.

Description from Goodreads:
Target big dreams and build a plan to achieve them! You’ve got one life, one shot, and all the power to make it happen. Get ready to dream big and live big. It’s all up to you. And it starts now. 

Total Blueprint for World Domination (17,000 words) is a powerful life-planning book for teens that will inspire. The book lets readers: 
*Explore hidden passions and find direction. 
*Create heart-pounding, toe-tingling goals. 
*Recruit an army for support. 
*Design a dream world and make it happen. 
*Achieve world domination step-by-step. 

Full of tips and tricks for tackling life’s challenges, Total Blueprint for World Domination is a book that will motivate readers to take their life to the next level. 

Anything is possible. And anything is possible for you. Believe it. Total Blueprint for World Domination takes you from this very second to your greatest dreams. So, are you ready?

This is WAY outside of my normal reading material, both because I don’t read a lot of self-help books and because I’m no longer a teenager. But I give all of the books sent to me consideration, so as the eminent book number 37 I chose to give it a go.

Review:
Total Blueprint for World Domination would make a great high school graduation present for a teenager…or maybe they need it at the beginning of their senior year to give them time to implement its advice. Either way, I can see it being very relevant in their lives. There has been some debate in psychological circles saying that modern Western society tells youths to go out and find their place in the world but doesn’t give them any instruction on how to identify it. Honestly, how helpful is telling 17-year-olds that they can be anything they want to be if they don’t know how to find what it is they want to be? It leaves them angsty and feeling anchor-less. Far smarter people than me have addressed this. They call it an identity crisis. Look up Erik Erikson if you’re interested. My point is that this book gives them a step-by-step blueprint of how to look into themselves and find what it is the world is telling them they should find. Contrary to the myth, it isn’t necessarily innate.

The book is written in an upbeat tone with a lot of modern media references. As a 35-year-old woman, I thought it sounded incredibly narcissistic and ‘kumbaya’, but I remember being a teenager and just how self-absorbed I was. It fits its audience. I can’t imagine any teenager having the forethought to pick this book up though. If they do, they probably don’t need it to start with. But all of you parents out there take heed. Many teenagers need advice like this.

Kade’s Dark Embrace

Book Review of Kade’s Dark Embrace, by Kim Grosso

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Kade's Dark EmbraceI grabbed Kym Grosso‘s erotic paranormal thriller, Kade’s Dark Embrace, off of Amazon’s KDP list.

Description from Goodreads:
After a series of girls are ritualistically murdered on the cold streets of Philadelphia, seasoned detective, Sydney Willows, is forced to work with sexy, alpha vampire, Kade Issacson. While working the case, Sydney finds herself inexplicably drawn to Kade, fighting the passion she feels towards him. Kade, determined to solve the case and mete out justice, is captivated by the independent, fiery detective. As he attempts to protect her from a very real murderer, Kade grows concerned that the beautiful, but very human detective, could easily end up dead should she tangle with supernatural forces that are beyond her control.

The investigation leads them into a dark and dangerous world, deep in the heart of New Orleans, where together, they search for the perpetrators of the Voodoo killings. Sydney soon becomes the target of the killer and ends up fighting for her life and love in the Big Easy. Will she eventually give into the intoxicating desire she feels for Kade if she makes it out alive?

Review:
This one really didn’t do it for me. I appreciated having a mature heroine who knew what she wanted sexually, no trembling virginal 20-somethings here. But Sydney just felt like a needy slut who disregarded even the most basic tenets of self-preservation, but still miraculously never seemed to get hurt. The dialogue was unnatural. Here is an example: “Now, now, little whore. You will not get away from me so easily. Consider yourself lucky that I cannot take your body for my own carnal pleasures before giving you to my Mistress. So greedy she is…she wants you all to herself.” Ugh, really? Sydney’s dedication to the children at the children’s centre came out of nowhere and felt very much like a forced effort to give her character some depth. It is a stunning example of insta-love. For Kade it starts before they even actually meet. Apparently a giant diamond engagement ring says I’ll love you for eternity better than a sacred blood bond. Who knew? The foray into the bondage scene just felt like pointless titillation and the sex scenes lacked sizzle.

There was a good mystery involved, but the whole thing wrapped up far too easily…and apparently no one needs a warrant to go kicking in doors in Philadelphia or New Orleans anymore…oh and why did it start in Philly again? There were also a number of editorial mistakes. So yea, not for me.

There were a few really funny lines though. Example: “Yep, no matter how supernatural you were, testicles were always vulnerable. Tried and true, Sydney loved how that worked.” Yep, funny. Setting the book in two such historic cities allowed for some good environmental atmosphere and I appreciated that. Plus, all of the alpha males seemed to be loyal, honourable, and looking for their forever mate. That’s sexy in and of itself. I think there’s probably a lot of potential here, but it didn’t feel realised…at least not in my opinion. Of course, that’s all any of this is.

 

Confessions of a Virgin Sacrifice

Book Review of Adrianne Ambrose’s Confessions of a Virgin Sacrifice

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Confessions of a Virgin SacrificeI grabbed Adrianne Ambrose‘s Confessions of a Virgin Sacrifice off of the KDP free list. At the time of posting it appears to still be free.

I occasionally comment on covers, usually just if I love or hate them. I don’t think I’ve ever made mention of the designer/artist, but this one is just too great to not comment on. It’s witty, funny, and the main reason I picked the book up in the first place. It was apparently done by Ted Naifeh. Well done, I say. Well done.

Description from Amazon:

Sound the alarm! Saddle the horses! Wake up the village elders! The Sacrificial Virgin has escaped!

Jezebelle’s voluptuous cousin Dizeray is slated for a sacrificial swan dive into the local volcano. Not if Jez can help it! She plots to rescue her cousin and find an eager candidate to ‘disqualify’ Diz from being this year’s Virgin Sacrifice. But things to horribly wrong and now the gals are on the run with the furious Village Elders in hot pursuit!

Jez sweeps her cousin on a whirlwind adventure through the jungle and beyond with nothing but her sardonic wit and bronze brassiere at her disposal. Along the way the two Glamazons attract a motley cast of characters including a brooding barbarian with a decidedly un-heroic phobia, an ill-tempered troll looking for love, and a deadly blue wolf with a soft spot for Jezebelle.

This unlikely troupe stumbles head first into one wacky adventure after another, encountering love, magic, monsters and mayhem. Throughout their travels, Jez untangles clues to her True Destiny. She discovers a Forbidden Secret that threatens to unravel the very fabric of her word–or at least ruin her day.

This saucy off-beat romp will keep you laughing as you follow Jez and her friends on their first adventure.

Review:

“I don’t believe in virgin sacrifice.  It encourages promiscuity at an early age.” How’s that for a first line? Great right? Or how about this one a few pages later? “Besides, she had large breasts, a trait frequently mistaken for beauty.” Yep, that one got a laugh out of me too. Confessions of a Virgin Sacrifice is not a book to be taken seriously. It is a rip-roaring good time, but utterly and completely absurd. The main character, Jezebelle, is a paragon of dauntless sarcasm, but her wit often highlights urbane truths. It’s a hoot. I lost track of how many passages I highlighted just because they were so funny. 

Be that as it may, she wasn’t my favourite aspect of the book. That would be Thor and Tul’s bemused side comments. I could easily imagine the bewildered look on their faces as they tried to figure out the actions of others. Priceless. 

I was thrown off on occasion by modern references. There I was reading along and  visualising the characters as Conan the Barbarian or Red Sonia types, maybe even Beast Master and then the author would throw in a Mason jar or a frilly lacy pillow. What!? I couldn’t quite reconcile their presence in the narrative. 

The book is quite short and ends on a cliffhanger, though I don’t know if another is planned. I almost hope one isn’t. I really enjoyed this book. It works, but I could see the joke getting old if drug out for too long. I’d hate to see that happen. It’s a gem just as it is. If you’re looking for a laugh give this one a try. That awesome parody on the cover ought to give you an idea of what you’d be in for.