I grabbed a copy of Angie Fox‘s The Accidental Demon Slayer from the Amazon free list. I believe that it is perma-free.

Description from Goodreads:
It’s never a good day when an ancient demon shows up on your toilet bowl. For Lizzie Brown, that’s just the beginning. Soon her hyperactive terrier starts talking, and her long-lost biker witch Grandma is hurling Smuckers jars filled with magic. Just when she thinks she’s seen it all, Lizzie learns she’s a demon slayer-and all hell is after her.

Of course, that’s not the only thing after her. Dimitri Kallinikos, a devastatingly handsome shape-shifting griffin needs Lizzie to slay a demon of his own. But how do you talk a girl you’ve never met into going straight to the underworld? Lie. And if that doesn’t work, how dangerous could a little seduction be…?

Review:
Meh. I’ve seen it done before and done better. Mechanically the writing was fine, as was the editing but the story itself and the plotting…disastrous. It’s a longish book. There should have been ample time to develop characters, a world and relationships However, Ms. Fox appears to have not bothered.

If this book was a cake, the eggs would still be in the shells (maybe even still in the container), the flour in its bag, the butter in the dish, the milk in the jug, etc, all tossed in a bowl to sit next to each other. All the ingredients are there (a hunky love interest, an unavoidable destiny, an evil antagonist, a spunky side-kick, etc), but not mixed, measured or cooked.

There is no depth to any of the characters and some, most notably Dimitri, are wildly inconsistent, as is the plot. Time is indeterminate. The whole book takes place in 2 or 3 days (not sure which), but characters talk about things happening days ago that appear to have happened hours earlier, at most. And at one point someone goes on what must have been an extended adventure in the time it takes Dimitri and Lizzie to sit up and say, ‘hi.’

A shirt is ripped open a page after it was slowly unbuttoned. Dimitri admits to a lie that couldn’t have held water with the rest of the knowledgeable coven. Plus, he talks like he just showed up but is also supposed to have been hanging out with the witches and werewolves for a while. The antagonist, who has been killing and absorbing the power of all the witches in America for a hundred plus years (so, you know strong and skilled), is somehow easily defeated by a slayer with two days of “training.” Honestly, how believable is that? I could go on, but you get the point, I imagine.

The book’s one real redeeming quality is the humour, but even it’s so over the top and ridiculous it can’t carry the load. No doubt, this will appeal to some. I’m just not one of those people. Too bad too, I spent forever deciding to read it.

Edit: Why the hell is she holding a sword on the cover? She uses a “switch star” (think Xena’s….round thing…with points). Not once does she use a sword. What’s more, the ONE TIME anyone does, it’s a katana.